


A Letter to Yoo

by Kyxngsoul



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Enjolras Is Bad At Feelings, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Why Did I Write This?, i dont know how tags work, jooki, kiheon, this is so bad im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2018-09-27
Packaged: 2019-07-18 02:53:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16109288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyxngsoul/pseuds/Kyxngsoul
Summary: Jooheon decides to write a letter to his former Ex Yoo Kihyun





	A Letter to Yoo

December 27 2017, The day we parted ways. Can you believe it’s gonna be a whole year since we’ve parted? I can’t. Almost a whole year without you by my side, a whole year without your soft gentle kisses. 

I’m writing this for me, to remind myself of what I took advantage of, to remind myself of how stupid I really am for letting go of the best thing I’ve had. I don’t think you’ll ever get this, I don’t think I have the guts to actually send this to you. But if somehow you do get this please know our split wasn’t your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong, you never did. It was because of me, I wasn’t well. I felt as if I didn’t deserve to love and have someone as beautiful as you. I wasn’t good enough for you, I’m still not. You deserved the best and nothing less. I couldn’t give that to you. I could barely give you my love, how was I supposed to give you everything you deserved? 

I damaged you, and I hurt you which I promised I’d never do. I broke that, I broke our trust. Our bond. I’m sorry. I’ve apologized so many times that it’s become a habit of mine...

I still have the sweater you gave me on Christmas. I haven’t worn it since... since the day we parted. I remember seeing the same exact sweater the night we went Christmas shopping. I had told you that I’ve been needing to buy myself a new sweater, seeing as my current one at the time was wearing out. I should’ve known you were going to buy me it, I didn’t want you to but you did anyway. You were always so stubborn, but I loved that about you... You were always so caring as well, every time I got a cold you were there, you helped me get better. You made me stews, made sure I took my medicine and made sure I was gonna end up being okay. You really did love me... 

Remember when you first confessed to me? You had messaged me asking me if I wanted to go on a walk with you to the park. You had walked all the way to my apartment, and in hand you had a cup of hot chocolate. From there we linked arms and made our way to the nearest park. On the way there you seemed like you were in deep thought. I was worried, so I had stopped and was about to ask you what was wrong when you kissed me. You kissed me and pulled back so fast before I could even react. To be honest I was shocked, I really didn’t expect you to kiss me. After that you started apologizing and started to ramble on how you shouldn’t have done that and that you were very sorry. Once I had realized what had just happened, I started laughing, and you got so mad at me for laughing. I guess I also confessed after that moment as well and from there on it’s always been me and you, you and me. Together forever... 

 

God I’m so sorry, but it’s too late for that now huh? We’ve both gone our separate ways and our worrying about our own lives. I still worry about you, you know? That time I heard of you was when Changkyun told me that you had found a boyfriend. Hearing him tell me that you found someone new, made me so happy. I’m glad you’ve found someone who can give you all the things I couldn’t. I hope he treats you well, and gives you everything you deserve. I hope he’s everything I am not. Please know that I am truly happy for you....

 

I really hope you’re happy now, and that you’re okay. Please give chewy lots of hugs and kisses for me yeah? Now before I finish this please know once more that you were never at fault in our split, it was all me. You were so sweet and kind and I didn’t deserve that, I didn’t deserve you. 

If you do get this, I want you to know that I am truly sorry for all of the bruises I’ve caused and the tears. For I will be good for all the times I never could...

 

 

Yours, Lee Jooheon

**Author's Note:**

> idfk what this is


End file.
